Reconnecting With Your Father - How To Take The First Step

The relationship between a father and child is one of the most important connections in a person’s life. However, sometimes this relationship can become strained. Maybe you’ve drifted apart over the years, or there are unresolved tensions between you two that made communication difficult. Whatever the cause is, it’s never too late to try and reconnect with your father.

One way to start is by sending him heartfelt messages. And, sometimes that’s all you need, a few genuine messages to let him know that you still care and want to strengthen your bond. To help you with this, in this article, I’ll share some examples of messages that you can use to bridge the gap and rekindle your relationship with your dad.

When Unresolved Issues Have Created a Rift Between You and Your Father

If you’ve found that there’s a growing distance between you and your father, it could be because of unresolved issues. These issues may have been caused by misunderstandings, disagreements, or hurt feelings that were never fully resolved.

However, you can get over this by discussing the issues with your dad. Here are a few messages to start the conversation:

• I know that we’ve had our differences in the past, but I want you to know that I love you and I want to work towards a better relationship. Can we talk about the issues that have been pushing us apart and see if we can find a way to move forward? Call me when you’re free.
• Dad, I understand we may not see eye to eye on certain things, but I still value our relationship and I want to find a way to close the distance between us. Can we try to put our differences aside and focus on the things that we do agree on?
• Dad, I want you to know that I cherish our relationship and I’m ready to go the extra mile to mend any misunderstandings or problems that may be separating us. Let’s talk heart to heart.
• I know that there are unresolved issues between us, and I’m willing to listen and work through them together.

When Distance and Busy Schedules Have Kept You and Your Father Apart

In this fast-paced world, it can be difficult to have a healthy relationship with your father when you live far away from him. Busy schedules get in the way as well. If you’re in this situation, call up and spend time together doing activities you both enjoy, such as fishing or other hobbies.

Below are messages you can send to bridge the gap that distance has created between you two:

• Thinking of all the great memories we made and looking forward to making more. Miss you, Dad!
• Distance may separate us, but you’re always close to my heart. Love you, Dad!
• Dad, you were never far from my mind, even though I was quite busy at work. Let’s plan a time to catch up soon.
• I miss you, Pa. Sending you a virtual hug. Can’t wait for the real thing.
• Distance may’ve kept us apart, but I’ll always be your son. Love you, Dad.

When Different Interests and Lifestyles Have Caused You to Grow Apart

Your father and you may not spend time together as much as you once did because of different interests or lifestyles. With the flow of time, people and their interests change. Yet that does not imply that you must distance yourself from your father.

Below are some messages you can use to build relationships that go beyond merely sharing interests with your dad.

• Dad, I understand that we have different interests, but I think we can still find things we will both like.
• Dad, I respect your lifestyle, but I feel like we’re not on the same page anymore. I want to talk about how we can reconnect and find common ground.
• I’ve been feeling like we don’t have as much in common as we used to. I really want to find something new that we can enjoy together. Let’s grab lunch on coming weekend.
• Dad, I realize that we both have changed over the years, but there are still so many things that we both love, like baseball or barbequing outside. Let’s get together and practice catch.

When You’re Trying to Reconnect With an Absent Father

Reconnecting with an absent father can be a challenging emotional journey. It's difficult to know where to start and what to say. Why not use the following messages as a starting point for reuniting with your estranged father?

• Hi, Dad! I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately and would love to have the opportunity to catch up.
• Hello, Dad. I would love to hear more about your life and share updates about mine. Maybe we can grab a coffee or lunch sometime soon?
• Dad, it’s never too late to reconnect. I understand that this may not be easy for either of us, but I’m committed to trying and hope that you are, too.
• Even though we haven’t talked in a while but I want you to know that I still care about you and want to be a part of your life.

When Past Trauma Has Kept You Away

You may have experienced abuse, neglect, or other traumatic events. It is understandable to feel hesitant about reconnecting with your father. However, if you feel ready to take that step, here are some messages that can help you express your feeling to your father:

• Dear Dad, I want you to know that I’m still healing from the things that I went through, but I want to work on rebuilding our relationship.
• Dad, I’m afraid to reconnect with you because of what happened in the past, but I am willing to try if we can establish boundaries that make me feel safe.
• Dad, I’ve been struggling with the impact of past trauma, and I want to talk to you about it so that we can move forward and connect in a healthy way.

Final Thoughts

Reconnecting with your father can be a challenging and emotional journey. But it’s a worthwhile endeavor that can bring immense joy and healing. By actively listening, communicating, setting boundaries, and spending quality time together, you can establish a stronger and healthier bond with him.  This father's day can be a great day to start the healing. Remember, it’s never too late to work towards a better relationship with your father.